The Irelanders' Adventures of The Animals of Farthing Wood: The Wood in Danger/Transcript

This is the script for The Irelanders' Adventures of The Animals of Farthing Wood: The Wood in Danger.

[The film begins with a live action footage of Chris and Martin Kratt]

Chris Kratt: We're here in Europe, in the woodlands. Hey, it's us, the Kratt Brothers.

Martin Kratt: I'm Martin.

Chris Kratt: And I'm Chris. And today, we're going to see all the woodland creatures in the wood with our guest, Connor Lacey.

Connor Lacey: Thanks, guys. Good to be here.

[They walk through the woods til they saw some woodland animals]

Chris Kratt: There's a fox.

Martin Kratt: And a badger.

Connor Lacey: There some rabbits over there.

Chris Kratt: These animals live together in these woods for years.

Martin Kratt: But sadly, their homes sometimes got destroyed by human construction.

Connor Lacey: And that can cause problems for them like de-hydration and starvation.

Chris Kratt: But thankfully, humans managed to find ways to protect the animals.

Martin Kratt: By building nature preserves to give them homes and protection from destruction.

Connor Lacey: Imagine if a group of animals traveled to a nature preserve.

Chris Kratt: Imagine if we have fox powers.

Kratt Bros and Connor Lacey: What if?

[The Kratt Bros change into their animated forms and they run off with Connor following them. The intro starts playing then ends with the title "The Irelanders' Adventures of The Animals of Farthing Wood: The Wood In Danger". The scene changes to a view of Farthing Wood with it's trees and stream in them. Then humans start cutting down tress with chainsaws and construction vehicles moving to dig up the dirt with their shovels. A toad dragged himself to the roots of a tree, tired out]

Toad: (panting) Not.... much further.

[He gasps and hops as a tree falls down to the ground. He keeps hopping but still he's tired]

Toad: I'm sure I must be nearly there.

[As the shovel keeps moving, Toad saw the wood just ahead of him]

Toad: Yes. This is it. (chuckles) This is my place. If I can just... (pants) keep going a little bit longer, I'II soon be.. (pants) home and dry.

[He yells as he saw the shovel above him. It lowers down and scoops up him and some dirt. As Toad peers over the shovel, the human push a lever and the shovel drops the dirt and Toad to the ground, burying him. A large rock lands on the pile, acting like a gravestone. A kestrel flies through the wood. A badger and a weasel survey the destruction]

Badger: Look at this place.

[Weasel looks up at Badger]

Badger: Just look at it, Weasel.

Weasel: (laughs) Doesn't get any better.

Badger: I don't know what you're laughing at. (sighs) How many more homes have we lost today, Owl?

[Owl sits on a branch fidgeting with a dead field mouse]

Owl: Half a dozen semi-detached burrows, 3 fully-furnished squirrel and at least 15 immaculately kept nests.

[A tree collapses]

Owl: Oh. 16.

[Badger and Weasel look at each other]

Badger: Chopping away at us every day. Still they're not satisfied.

Weasel: (gulps) Don't look now. They'll be on us any minute. Any second.

Badger: (sighs) Our days are numbered.

[Kestrel arrives]

Kestrel: Won't be long now. Won't be long now. Now that they've filled in the pond.

[Badger and Weasel look at each other in shock]

Owl: [dropping her field mouse] Not Farthing Wood pond.

Kestrel: Correct.

Badger: Our last remaining watering hole

[Cut to a shot of a machine filling the pond with dirt]

Weasel: Hard luck on the ducks. (laughs) But we're alright. We've still got the stream.

[Badger walk over the pile of dirt where Toad was buried with Weasel]

Badger: Don't you mean the muddy trickle? Hmm?

[Weasel nods. A rabbit and a hedgehog are drinking from the trickle when a fox's shadow looms over the hedgehog who curls up in a ball. Fox drops the prey he's caught and surveys the scene]

Fox: Dear, oh, dear.

Badger: Ah, you here too, Fox? Just thought we'd wander down and, um... er... um...

Weasel: See the situation.

Badger: Oh, yes. For ourselves.

Fox: Doesn't look too good, does it, old son. And if those big rains don't come soon. Then our outlooks...

Badger: Skysy? Hmm?

[Rabbit turns back to the trickle. Fox crosses to the other side]

Fox: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Weasel: Looks like we've got a bit of a problem.

Badger: And a major one at that.

Fox: Important enough to warrant an assembly, I reckon.

Badger: An assembly, Fox?

[Hedgehog and Rabbit look at Fox in surprise. Badger and Weasel look at each other]

Weasel: A get together, for all the animals?

Fox: It's not a party, Weasel.

[Weasel looks offended]

Badger: Is an, an assembly a bit drastic?

[Fox walks up to a small ridge near the trickle]

Fox: If this isn't drastic...

Hedgehog: Hmm. Exactly.

Fox: Then what is?

Badger: But a Farthing Wood assembly, Fox? Why we haven't had one of those in years. They're only ever called if there's an.... er...

Weasel: An emergency?

[Badger joins Fox near the trickle]

Fox: And I'd call this an emergency.

Weasel: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Fox: Not to put too fine a point on it, without water, we animals of Farthing Wood are hardly likely to survive.

Hedgehog: Hmm. Here, here.

Weasel: I mean, if you wouldn't call that an emergency, what would you call it? Alice? [laughs]

Badger: Very funny.

Hedgehog: But if you don't mind my asking, what will having some assembly achieve?

Female Rabbit: What can we mere animals do?

Fox: I'm not sure yet. But I reckon that if you and me and Badger and Weasel can get every single member of our woodland community together, fast, then maybe one of us might come up with...

Female Rabbit: A solution?

Weasel: Clever clogs, clever clogs.

Female Rabbit: Fox is absolutely right, you know, everyone. One just can't panic. No, no, no. One really has to roll up one's fur and do something.

Badger and Weasel: Right.

[Female Rabbit crosses her arms and nods]

Fox: Course. Persuading our not all together harmonious population to attend such an assembly would not be what you'd call easy. However, I'm sure you'll sort it out, Badger.

Badger: Yes. What? Who? Me?

[Weasel nods]

Fox: Who better?

Badger: Why that's awfully descent of you, Fox, but...

Fox: I mean after all, you know everyone of us here about, don't you.

Weasel: Biggest busy body in the wood. [laughs]

Badger: Shut up, Weasel.

Fox: And everybody knows you. So...

Badger: Of course, Fox. Just leave all the um, arrangements to me. Hmm?

Fox: That's my badger. Knew I could rely on you.

[Fox walks away]

Badger: Well, don't just sit there differing as usual, Rabbit. Off you go and...

Female Rabbit: And... And... Don't panic.

Badger: And alert Hare of course.

[Female Rabbit hops away]

Badger: And as for you, Hedgehog, old chap. Just roll yourself up and roll yourself off and start looking for the Newts.

[Hedgehog bumps into Weasel]

Weasel: OW!

Hedgehog: Right you are, Badger. Sorry, Weasel.

Weasel: Ooooh.

Badger: Mole? Did you say Mole? Well, he'll soon come scurrying once he hears all the commotion.

[Mole is fast asleep underground. Weasel looks at Badger]

Weasel: What are you going to tell them, Badger?

Badger: Tell me? Why, tell everyone that we're to meet at my place.

Weasel: Your set?!

Badger: And what is wrong with my set, Weasel?

Weasel: Oh, nothing, Badger. Nothing at all. Only...

Badger: Get to the point, Weasel.

Weasel: Well, it's alright for you and me and the shrews and the field mice. We're creatures of the underground right? We're used to it. Only...

Badger: Only what?

Weasel: The birds aren't gonna like it very much are they, Badger? Imagine Owly. [laughs]

[Owl sits on her branch with her back turned]

Weasel: And Kestrel. They aren't gonna like it, are they?

Badger: Well, it won't be for long. And I'm sure they'll realize it's in a good cause.

Weasel: Okay.

Badger: Well don't just stand there, Weasel. Make yourself useful.

Weasel: Me?

Badger: Let's go and alert a few Voles.

[Two Voles pop out of a hole in the ground]

Badger: And so, Mrs Vole, Fox and I are agreed that the situation that we're experiencing is so severe as to merit a meeting.

Mrs Vole: What's he going on about?

Weasel: He's worried whether you're eating!

Badger: Oh, shut up. We're having a meeting! In my chambers!

[Mrs Vole climbs out of the hole]

Mrs Vole: I meet where I like.

Badger: A meeting at...

Weasel: Sunset.

[Weasel bounds away. As Badger walks off, he turn to look back at the Voles]

Badger: And please don't be late, Mrs Vole. And tell the others.

[Weasel is talking to a shrew]

Weasel: Bring your brothers!

Badger: And tell all the field mice!

Weasel: [to some squirrels] And tell all the shrews!

Squirrels: Okie-dokie!

[They bound across the branches to where Owl is perched]

Squirrels: Sunset!

[A shrew runs over to a dirt mount. Badger and Weasel walk through the wood]

Badger: Is there any one at all that we've forgotten, Weasel?

Weasel: [stopping] There is.

Badger: [stopping] Yes?

Weasel: Your friend and mine. [makes hisses]

Badger: Oh, yes.

[A field mouse runs away from an Adder chasing it. Weasel steps on her tail and Adder hisses at her]

Badger: Well, just make sure that you impress upon her that we haven't called this meeting so that she scourge herself on everyone present.

Weasel: You'll be lucky.

[The scene changes to the Tortuga flying