California Race (Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Ed-ventures)

The way the California Race scene goes in Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Ed-ventures of Cars.

(The screen then shows a hill and goes over it to show the Los Angeles International Speedway. Bob and Darrell are heard talking as Al Oft flies over, along with the spectators coming into the circuit.)

Bob Cutlass: Hello, race fans. And welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three-way battle for the Piston Cup!

Darrell Cartrip: Bob, there's a crowd of nearly 200,000 humans and cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day!

Bob Cutlass: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 lap, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race.

(Then the screen fades to a different shot and moves to Darrell and Bob, who are in front of a couple of spectators, along with Todd the Pizza Planet truck and Elvis.)

Darrell Cartrip: Now, Bob, you know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin', buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Whoo! Man, this is exciting!

(The screen then shows several closed signs on different buildings as Bob is talking, such as a person turning a sign from "Open" to "Closed", the sign for the East Honkers Shopping Mall saying "Closed for race", and Emeryville's sign showing a label saying "Closed for the race", and at the end of Bob's line, the screen shows some trucks and drivers watching the race on TV.)

Bob Cutlass: In fact, the country has almost shut down to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century."

(The King's pit crew have finished putting a new set of tires on him, when Junior appears.)

Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me.

The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it.

Lynda Weathers: Hey, be careful out there, OK?

The King: Yeah, man.

(Then the screen shows Chick with the press again, with Mia and Tia behind him.)

Mia: (gasps) He's so hot!

Female Photographer: I know, right? (giggles)

Chick Hicks: (while the photographers are talking) Oh, yeah. You wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! (the press take pictures as he poses) Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! (the press join in) Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka!

(Meanwhile, a security officer named Marco Axelbender notices Fred while checking all of the spectators with another security officer.)

Marco Axelbender: (to Fred) Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass!

Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me!

Mario Andretti: (coming up with Patty) Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it?

Marco Axelbender: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti.

Fred: (chuckles)

Mario Andretti: And good morning to you, uh, (looks at Fred's license plate) Fred.

Fred: Mario Andretti knows my name! (to Marco) You gotta let me in now!

Marco Axelbender: Sorry, pal.

(The screen then moves and zooms in on Mack's trailer as the press surround it. McQueen's voice is heard.)

Lightning McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed.

(The screen goes black.)

Lightning McQueen: I am speed.

(The screen then shows the same shot of racecars whizzing past as shown at the very beginning of the film, before going back to black.)

Lightning McQueen: Victory. One winner, two losers.

(The screen then shows the same shot of McQueen racing from when he was preparing while inside Mack's trailer at the very beginning of the film.)

Lightning McQueen: Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed...

(The sound of birds singing is then heard as the screen then shows the view of Radiator Springs from Wheel Well, before changing to show Mater, Sheriff, Luigi, Guido, Sarge, Fillmore, Red, Ramone, Flo and Lizzie while in the town, then it changes to show Roary, Theodore and their whole entire team smiling (except, or course) while in the town. Just then, Mack knocks on the trailer's door.)

Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready?

Lightning McQueen: (gasps) Y-Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm, uh... I'm ready.

(McQueen then opens the door and comes out, noticing the press chattering indistinctly and taking pictures of him. The screen then shows an aerial view of the circuit, before coming back to the ground to show McQueen driving to Mack, who is wearing a headset.)

Lightning McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today.

Mack: Ah... Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name.

Lightning McQueen: It is?

Mack: Ah... Not really.

(The Alphanumeros are then shown driving along the track, forming the words "Piston Cup" as the crowd cheers. Then the Convoy Brothers are shown shouting as the camera pans past them, showing a caravan drinking Dinoco Light, and Syd VanDerKamper sitting in an inflatable pool surrounded by little palm trees, Dinoco cans and plastic flamingos. Barney Stormin is then shown completing his skywriting of "Piston Cup", and then hears Marco, Stu Bop and another jet heading towards him.)

Barney Stormin: Uh-oh! (flies out of the way)

(The jets then fly through the skywriting and over the circuit, where the crowd is cheering and laughing upon seeing them. Coriander Widetrack giggles upon seeing them, wearing a Marco toy on her antenna. Two of the jets then fly away in different directions, as the screen then shows Artie and another announcer looking at the different cameras.)

Artie: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16.

(One of the TV cameras then changes to show McQueen on the track with Chick and the King, as they warm up while behind Charlie Checker. While Bob and Darrell are talking, the cameramen aim their cameras at McQueen.)

Bob Cutlass: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs.

Darrell Cartrip: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things.

Lightning McQueen: (as Chick's "C" sticker shines sunlight over his eyes) Oh!

Chick Hicks: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! (chuckles) Hey, where you been, McQueen? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Oh, and the twins. Of course. You know, the ones that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think...

(But then McQueen daydreams of when he sees Sally driving along the bridge beside the waterfall in Tailfin Pass, then of Princesses Twilight Sparkle, Celestia, Luna and Cadance, Sunset Shimmer, Roary, Theodore and the rest of the team outside of Radiator Springs teaching him about the magic of friendship.)

Princess Twilight Sparkle: (voice)

(voice)

(voice)

(voice)

(voice)

(voice)

(Just then, a green flag is waved as the screen then shows Dexter Hoover waving it to start the race. The King and Chick get on their way, but McQueen was not ready.)

Lightning McQueen: Agh! Shoot! (gets on his way)

Darrell Cartrip: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'!

(The screen shows the three racecars racing, as McQueen is a couple of seconds behind and catching up. The crowd is seen cheering, as the camera moves to show Lynda and Tex cheering on for the King.)

Lynda Weathers: Come on, you can do it!

Tex Dinoco: Come on, King, make us proud, boy!

Bob Cutlass: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead.

Darrell Cartrip: (as McQueen gets beside Chick) Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside!

(But then, Chick goes right in front of McQueen, causing him to brake.)

Darrell Cartrip: Oh! Chick slammed the door on him!

Bob Cutlass: Chick's not making it easy on him today.

Darrell Cartrip: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down!

(The screen changes to McQueen's point of view as he sees the King and Chick ahead. The screen then changes as McQueen daydreams again, showing him following Sally, Roary, Theodore and their whole entire team driving, flying and running through the woods, as soft music is heard along with birds singing.)

Roary: (voice) Catch me if you can, McQueen...my big brother!

(But when Sally splashes through the puddle, McQueen then notices he is heading towards the barrier, and turns away, with his brakes squealing, and spins off the track.)

Bob Cutlass: Oh, McQueen spins out in the infield!

Mia and Tia: (both gasp along with the crowd)

(McQueen then comes to a stop on the infield.)

Chick Hicks: (chuckles) Ha-ha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today!

Chick Hicks' Pit Crew: (all laugh)

Lightning McQueen: (groans and drives back onto the track)

Mack: (through the radio) Hey, kid, are you all right?

Lightning McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I, uh... I, uh... I don't think I...

Doc Hudson: (through the radio) I didn't come all this way to see you quit.

Roary: (through the radio) And neither did us!

(McQueen then looks to see Doc, Roary, Theodore, their whole entire team and most of the Radiator Springs residents in his pit. Ramone has had a new paint job, being red with McQueen's bolt, while Doc has his original racing paint job and tires and a headset, which Roary,, and also had to contact with McQueen on his radio.)

Lightning McQueen: Doc? Roary?

Radiator Springs townsfolk: (all cheer)

Lightning McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this!

Well, Sally, Red and Lizzie have stayed behind to watch the race on TV.

Thomas: We have come here to be your pit crew!

And we've got your back!

Victor: And that's what friends are for, McQueen, and you are our best friend!

Bash, Dash and Ferdinand: That's right!

Doc Hudson: And I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad.

Lightning McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back.

Doc Hudson: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye.

Mater: Goodbye! OK, I'm good.

Princess Twilight Sparkle: (laughs) No need to say it now, Mater, 'cause we're helping McQueen.

Roary:

Lightning McQueen: (chuckles)

(McQueen then comes to the pits, as Mater holds the sign, which has Radiator Springs' logo on it. Fillmore and Sarge refuel McQueen.)

Doc Hudson: All right, if you can drive as good as you can fix a road then you can win this race with your eyes shut. Now, get back out there!

(McQueen then drives back out through the pit lane.)

Doc Hudson: Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews, boys. You're gonna have to be fast.

Luigi: They will not know what bit them!

Doc Hudson: (to McQueen, through the radio) Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back.

(McQueen then goes faster, going around the bends and catching up. Then the Dinoco pit crew notice Doc in his look, murmuring as they see him.)

HTB Pitty 1: Is it?

HTB Pitty 2: Oh, wow. That's him!

Artie: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob! Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back!

Bob Cutlass: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief!

(All of the cameramen turn their cameras to show Doc, and the crowd then notices him.)

Larry: Whoa! Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet!

Albert Hinkey: Whoa!

Doug R.M.: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is.

(A whistle is heard, and the crowd then cheers. The screen then shows a TV at Flo's V8 Cafe showing Doc, as Sally, Red and Lizzie are watching the race on TV back in Radiator Springs.)

Bob Cutlass: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years!

Lizzie: (noticing Doc on the TV, not realizing it is him) Hey, Doc! Come look at this fellow on the radio. He looks just like you.

(Sally and Red chuckle. Then the screen shows McQueen catching up to the King and Chick, and he manages to get past.)

Bob Cutlass: McQueen passes them on the inside!

Darrell Cartrip: But he's still nearly a lap down!

Bob Cutlass: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go?

Doc Hudson: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on.

Guido: Vai! Vai, vai! (pushes a cart of tires away)

Wide Chick Pitty: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car!

Chick Hicks' Pit Crew: (all laugh)

Guido: (angered) Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando?

Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance, Guido. You will have your chance.

Guido: (folds his forks)

Big McIntosh: Eeyup.

(McQueen is then seen racing, progressing through the race and managing to get to Chick and the King.)

Chick Hicks: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? (as McQueen gets beside him) What do you think of this? (hits McQueen, causing him to spin) Yeah, that's it, kid.

(But McQueen manages to keep up with going backwards and past Chick.)

Chick Hicks: What?!

Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done!

Well done, McQueen!

Lightning McQueen: (winks, and turns back around)

Mater: (laughs) I taught him that. (poses to Chick's pit crew) Ka-chow!

Wide Chick Pitty and HTB Pitty: (getting their eyes hit by the sunlight reflecting off Mater's wing mirror) Ah!

(laughing)

Bob Cutlass: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders.

Darrell Cartrip: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go!

Tex Dinoco: (chortles) Look at that boy go out there!

(Chick then tries to get past McQueen, but gets blocked on several attempts.)

Chick Hicks: Oh! (grunts, before coming up beside McQueen) No, you don't! (presses against McQueen, causing a puncture in one of his rear tires)

Edward: Come on! That's not even fair!

Lightning McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat!

Doc Hudson: Can you get back to the pits?

Lightning McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so.

Doc Hudson: (noticing Dexter waving a yellow flag) Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid.

(Charlie Checker then comes out in front of the King and Chick.)

Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race!

Thomas: We have got to make this a quick pit stop!

Doc Hudson: Guido! It's time.

Wide Chick Pitty: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield?

(As McQueen comes into the pits, Guido throws the new tires up in the air, quickly takes off the old tires and catches the new tires, and puts them on, lasting four seconds, before McQueen gets going again. Chick's crew then feel shocked, and all of the pitties' grilles, except the one of Wide Chick Pitty, fall off.)

Patrick Star: Ha-ha! Mustaches falling off!

Darrell Cartrip: I don't believe it!

Bob Cutlass: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen!

Darrell Cartrip: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out!

Bob Cutlass: It's gonna be close.

(McQueen manages to get back in front of Charlie. His pit crew then cheers.)

Albert Hinkey: Yeah, baby!

(All of the crowd holler.)

Darrell Cartrip: Yay, he's back in the race!

Guido: (blows his wheel gun) Peet stop.

(Then Wide Chick Pitty's grill falls off. All of McQueen's pit crew then cheer for Guido.)

Sarge: Guido, you did it!

Fillmore: Way to go, Guido!

Roary: You've managed to make a quick pit stop!

(McQueen manages to catch up to the other racers as Charlie comes back in. The crowd is seen again, cheering, before the camera shows Dexter waving the white flag.)

Bob Cutlass: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback!

Darrell Cartrip: A hundred and ninety-nine laps! And baby, it all comes down to this!

Doc Hudson: (through the radio to McQueen) This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go!

(McQueen closes in, revving his engine, and is about to pass Chick, who tries get in front again, but McQueen swerves and goes to the other side.)

Chick Hicks: We'll see about that! (tries to get in front of McQueen, who then brakes, causing Chick to press against the wall, and making McQueen able to go past)

Bob Cutlass: McQueen's going inside!

(But then, Chick rams McQueen off the track, and then hits the King, causing them both to serpentine.)

Bob Cutlass: Chick and the King are loose!

Darrell Cartrip: I think McQueen is out of the race!

(McQueen suddenly gets a thought, and turns his front tires right, impressing Doc and our heroes as it helps McQueen to get back on the track and past the King and Chick.)

Darrell Cartrip: McQueen saved it!

Bob Cutlass: He's back on the track!

Doc Hudson: Float like a Cadillac...

Lightning McQueen: Sting like a Beemer!

Larry: Whoooo!

Doug R.M.: (whistles)

Albert Hinkey: Ka-chow! Ka-chow! Ka...

Radiator Springs townsfolk, Roary, Theodore Tugboat and their team: (all cheer)

Bash: You've got...

Dash: ...the momentum!

Ferdinand: That's right!

Pinkie Pie:

Darrell Cartrip: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup!

Sally Carrera: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers!

Chick Hicks: (grunts as the King keeps blocking him) I am not comin' in behind you again, old man!

(Chick then rams the King off the track, causing him to go through the air, hitting the infield several times and spinning, before coming to a stop, having huge damage. The crowd gasps at what happened.)

Lynda Weathers: Oh, no!

(Doc feels shocked)

(Then McQueen notices on the circuit's television screen what has happened, then the screen changes to show the newspaper about Doc's crash. Realizing what had happened to Doc, McQueen grinds to a halt before reaching the finish line, leaving the crowd shocked and puzzled.)

What the...?

Roary: McQueen?

Why has he stopped?

Is he out of fuel?

Princess Twilight Sparkle: No, ! He just stopped!

Chick Hicks: (crossing the finish line) Yeah! Whoo-hoo! (goes onto the infield and spins around) I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah!

Are you kidding me?

He's just let Chick win the race!

Flo: What's he up to, Doc?

(Doc then gets a smile before McQueen drives backwards towards the King.)

The King: (grunting and moaning) What are you doin', kid?

Lightning McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. (begins to push the King along the track)

The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that?

Lightning McQueen: Ah. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup.

(Doc, smile, as well as the crowd.)

Bob Cutlass: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal?

Darrell Cartrip: Hey, man, he's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft.

Chick Hicks: (still cheering) Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! (stops spinning upon noticing something) Hey! What? What's goin' on?

Doug R.M.: That's what I call racin' right there.

Albert Hinkey: (sobs)

Tex Dinoco: (laughs)

(McQueen pushes the King across the finish line, which Dexter waves the checkered flag, and the crowd cheers wildly, throwing merchandise in the air.)

I see it! He was getting the King to finish! Whoo-hoo!

Ferdinand: That's right!

Luigi: Bravo il mio amico!

Mater: Way to go, buddy!

Rainbow Dash and Human Rainbow Dash: Well done, McQueen!

Fillmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man?

Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Fillmore.

Lizzie: That's my hot rod!

(Red and Sally also smile. Then the camera shows Chick on the stage as he is surrounded by Mia, Tia and the press, who are all frowning, standing still and remaining quiet.)

Chick Hicks: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! (The trophy appears next to him.) Yeah-h-h! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! (gets shot at by the confetti) Ow! Ow! Easy with the confetti! What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka!

Photographer: Boo!

Tim Rimmer: Boo!

Mia and Tia: Boo!

Chick Hicks: What's wrong with everybody? (gets hit by a tire) Ow! What's happening? Where's the happiness? (as the press, Mia and Tia all throw tires, shoes, "C" merchandise, oil cans and cartons at him) Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! (leaves with his trophy, before coming across Princess Luna, )

Princess Luna: (uses her magic to take the trophy away from Chick) Chick! You are not going to be sponsored by Dinoco!

Chick Hicks: What?! Are you lot crazy!

Princess Luna: Tex has said that he is not allowing you to join, because all you did was causing the King to crash!

Chick Hicks: (groans) Oh, come on!

Princess Luna: You should learn not to purposely cause crashes, Chick, and do clean races. .

Radar: Take him away, boys!



Chick Hicks: (yells) Aaarrrghhh!! You will all pay for this! I will get my revenge! (the police cars took him away)

(Meanwhile, McQueen pushes the King back to the Dinoco stage. Lynda then kisses McQueen on the cheek.)

Lynda Weathers: Thanks, Lightnin'.

Lightning McQueen: You're welcome. (leaves)

Larry: Way to go, King!

Doug R.M.: You're still the car! (whistles)

Albert Hinkey: You're The King! Yeah!

(The crowd then cheers, before McQueen comes back to the Rust-eze team, who are laughing and cheering.)

Rusty Rust-eze: You made us proud, kid!

Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko!

Doc Hudson: You got a lotta stuff, kid.

Lightning McQueen: Thanks, Doc.

Roary: (giving McQueen a special hug) Congratulations, McQueen!

Lightning McQueen: Thanks, Roary. And I Pinkie promise that I will never let you out of my wing from now on.

Roary: Thank you, McQueen...my new big brother.

Lightning McQueen: And now, I love you, too, Roary...my new little brother. (He and Roary hug some more)

Tex Dinoco: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco?

Lightning McQueen: (feeling surprised, looks towards the Dinoco team, which Rotor Turbosky winks) But I didn't win.

Tex Dinoco: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'.

Dusty Rust-eze: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street buzzards used to circle the car!

Rust-eze team, Radiator Springs residents, Roary, Theodore and their team: (all laugh)

Lightning McQueen: (looking towards them) Thank you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Also, Twilight and her friends just started teaching me about friendship. And I just promised Roary that I'm taking him under my wing from now on. . So, I'm going to stay with them forever.

Tex Dinoco: Well, I sure can respect all that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know.

Lightning McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing.