The Irelanders' Adventures of Thomas & Friends: No More Mr Nice Engine

Here's the script for The Irelanders' Adventures of Thomas & Friends: No More Mr Nice Engine.

[The episode starts with Hiro puffing along the main line with Connor passing him]

Narrator: No More Mr Nice Engine. Hiro is one of the strongest engines on the island of Sodor.

[He stop in front of a family of ducks waddling across the tracks]

Narrator: But he's also very polite and kind.

[A duck quacks as if to thank Hiro. Hiro's at the washdown when Thomas arrives all dirty]

Hiro: After you, Thomas. Looks like you need a wash.

Thomas: Thank you, Hiro.

[Hiro whistles and reverses. The scene changes to the shunting yard where Diesel is working]

Narrator: One morning, Diesel was shunting some Troublesome Trucks in the yard.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee! Ouch!

[Diesel bumps them into line]

Diesel: Now get in line, you silly trucks! And stay still!

[Zach Varmitech comes over]

Zach Varmitech: Hey, big D. What's going on?

Diesel: I'm trying to get those Troublesome Trucks in line to stop doing mischief to engines. I don't suppose you and your Zachbots can help out.

Zach Varmitech: Zachbots, get those trucks in line and make sure they behave.

[The Zachbots obey and get to work. Edward blew his whistles as he got uncoupled from the trucks he's just brought]

Narrator: Edward had delivered trucks of milk, butter and cheese for Hiro to collect.

Diesel: Right, now it's your turn.

[He bump the trucks, knocking over the milk churns in the process]

Edward: Stop biffing the trucks, Diesel! You're spilling the milk!

Diesel: It's the only way to get these Troublesome Trucks to do what you want, Edward.

[He biffs the trucks that still need to be gotten into line]

Troublesome Trucks: Ow! Ow!

Diesel: So mind your own business.

Zach Varmitech: Yeah, old timer! Scram!

Edward: Oh. (whistles)

[He puff away. Hiro arrives with the Irelanders]

Narrator: A little later, Hiro arrived with the Irelanders, Marco Polo and his friends.

Hiro: Good morning, Diesel. Good morning, Zach. Good morning, trucks.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee-haha!

Connor Lacey: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Laugh it up.

Twilight Sparkle: Real funny.

Mewtwo: Look at who else is here.

[They look to see Diesel and Zach glaring at them]

Violet Parr: Well, well, well, if it isn't our two old nemesises.

Zach Varmitech: And if it isn't the Irelanders and annoying Wild Rats.

Chris and Martin Kratt: Wild Kratts!

Zach Varmitech: Whatever!

Diesel: What brings you all here?

Maisie Lockwood: We're helping Hiro collecting milk, butter and cheese to Knapford's cafe.

Marco Polo: Yes. That's what we're doing.

Diesel: Oh, Hiro. Don't be such a "Mr Nice Engine". These trucks are nothing but troublesome and you need to show them who's boss.

[He biff the trucks forward]

Troublesome Trucks: Ow!

Hiro: No, Diesel, these trucks are no trouble. I am Master of the Railway.

Zach Varmitech: Oh, really? Since when people call you that when you can't run a railway like humans can?

Shi La Won: Since his time in Japan. And don't insult my BJFF's title like that!

Zach Varmitech: Oh, you're just too stupid because you should know that I'm a better inventor than Aviva any day.

Diesel: And that diesels are much more modern and better than old slow and out of date steamies who should be scrapped years ago so we deserves titles not steamies.

Aviva Corcovado: Oh really? My inventions have always been better than Zach's many times and steam engines deserve to have titles as well as diesels.

[Diesel growls]

Zach Varmitech: You just got lucky in the past. My inventions have always been superior to yours.

[Fu Fu growls at Zach]

Zach Varmitech: Aaah!

[He jumps onto his Zachbot then climbs down]

Zach Varmitech: What's wrong with it?

Connor Lacey: That he doesn't like you insulting Aviva and Shi La like that.

Zach Varmitech: (sarcastic) Ha-ha. It's so small. Must be a runt.

Shi La Won: Fu Fu is not a runt! He's just a baby.

Fireman Sam: Yes. We need to continue this later.

Hiro: Sam's right. Right now, we need to deliver the dairy produce to Knapford and we cannot be late.

Connor Lacey: Yes. Now if you'll excuse us, we'll be on our way.

Narrator: Hiro collected the trucks and puffed away.

[The manager blew his whistle and Hiro toots as he set off]

Narrator: But he didn't know that Diesel had already spilled the milk.

[Scene cuts to Hiro puffing along the Mainline]

Narrator: It wasn't long before the trucks started to become troublesome.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee! Biff and bash! Biff and bash!

Shi La Won: Stop that!

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Spike: Quit it!

Hiro: Ho-ho, you can try and be troublesome, little trucks, but I am Master of the Railway.

Connor Lacey: (surprised at Hiro not bothered) How do you handle their troublesome antics?

Hiro: The same way Edward and Salty keeps them behave and be polite and kind.

Shi La Won: Oh. I see.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Narrator: The Troublesome Trucks made Hiro bump and judder, but he just kept puffing all the way to Knapford Station, where the Fat Controller was waiting from him.

The Fat Controller: At last, the supplies for the cafeteria.

Narrator: The men worked to unload bread and butter and cheese.

The Fat Controller: Let's not forget the milk.

Narrator: But when The Fat Controller opened the door to the milk truck......

[The truck is opened and the milk spills out]

Narrator: ...the milk poured out.

The Fat Controller: Oh, no! My trousers!

Connor Lacey: Oh, my goodness.

Shi La Won: Oh, dear.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Hiro: Oh, sir. I'm so sorry, sir. We... We don't know what happened. But the Troublesome Trucks have been very troublesome today.

Mewtwo: We know, they always are.

The Fat Controller: I hope you and the Irelanders will be more careful on your next job, Hiro.

Hiro: Yes, sir. We will, sir.

The Fat Controller: And it looks like my next job will be to get my trousers cleaned.

[He heads off]

Narrator: Hiro felt very bad about what had happened to the Fat Controller's trousers.

Shi La Won: Aw, don't be like that, Hiro. I know you didn't mean for the milk to spill on his trousers like that.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Hiro: I know, Shi La but I feel ashamed about it.

Twilight Sparkle: I'm just being curious here but the milk was spilled inside the truck.

Martin Kratt: Because of the trucks and their tricks.

Twilight Sparkle: No, what I mean, Martin, is that someone else caused this.

Connor Lacey: Like who?

Twilight Sparkle: Someone who we ran into just this morning. But let's keep that to ourselves for now.

Slyly: Here's a little secret, Hiro. When things get bad, I mean real bad, just remember, it could always be worse.

Hiro: How?

Slyly: Allow me, ahem, to elaborate.

[He starts singing It Could Always Be Worse]

Slyly: (singing) If the glass looks half empty,~

And your prospects are low.

Attitude adjustment's the only way to go

Things could be worse than that

You could be lost in the desert,

200 degrees,

No water around, and lots of snakes and bees

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

They could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

(Remember, it could always be worse)

You could be out to sea,

With no land in sight

Surrounded by sharks, with a big appetite

Things could be worse than that!

You could be lost in a forest,

End up stuck up in a tree

Chased by a Monster,

And no way to get free

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

They could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

(Remember, it could always be worse)

Don't look so sad,

And don't feel so bad,

That's not so hard to do...

Cause things could be worse than that

Life throws you some curves,

But just change your demeanor.

Cause trust me my friend,

the grass, it ain't always greener

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

It could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

Remember, it could always be worse

(Let me hear the band!!)

Remember, it could always be worse (laughs)