Meeting the Geese

{cut to the geese walking}

Amelia: What beautiful countryside, Abigail. So much like our own dear England.

Abigail:  Oh, indeed, yes. Amelia, if I walk much farther I'll get flat feet.

Amelia: Abigail, we were born with flat feet.

[They both laugh]

Abigail: I say, look over there.

[The see O'Malley who leaves his log and bites a twig]

Amelia: Oh. Oh, how unusual.

Abigail: Fancy that, a cat learning how to swim.

[O'Malley, holding a twig, paddles closer to the shore]

Amelia: And he's going about it all the wrong way.

Abigail: Quite. We must correct him.

[They swim towards him]

Amelia: Sir. Sir? You are most fortunate we happened along.

Abigail: Yes. We're here to help you.

O'Malley (through clenched teeth) Oh no, back off girls, I'm doin' fine.

Abigail: First, you must gain self-confidence by striking out on your own.

O'Malley: Go away! I'm trying' to get to shore.

Amelia: You will never learn to swim properly with that willow branch in your mouth.

[O'Malley gets his hind legs on some rock]

Abigail: Indeed not.

Amelia: Snip, snip. Here we go.

O'Malley opens the mouth: Don't do that!

[He splashes wildly]

Abigail: You're doing splendidly.

Amelia: And don't worry about form. It will come later.

Abigail: He takes to water like a fish, doesn't he?

A very enthusiastic--

[O'Malley tugs on their tailfeathers, they shiek]

Amelia: No! Now, this is no time for fun and games.

[They laugh, watching bubbles coming from where O'Malley was.. Laughing fades]

Abigail: Gracious me. You don't suppose--

Amelia: Oh yes. Yes, I do. Bottoms up!

[They turn over and look underwater, then turn back]

Both: Deeper!

[Kittens and Duchess run to the shore]

Toulouse: Look mama, there he is!

Abigail: You really did quite well for a beginner.

Duchess: Oh Thomas! Thank goodness you're safe!

Abigail: Keep practicing.

Amelia: And toodly-pip!

Toulouse: Can I help you, mister O'Malley, huh?

O'Malley gasps: Help? I've had all the help I can take.

Duchess: Oh mademoiselles, thank you so much for helping mister O'Malley.

Amelia: Of course, my dear. But first, introductions.

Abigail: Yes. We british like to keep things proper.

[They laugh]

Amelia: Now, I am Amelia Gabble, and this is my sister--

Abigail: Miss Abigail Gabble.

Amelia: We're twin sisters.

Abigail: You might say we're related.

[They laugh]

Amelia: Oh, how silly!

Duchess: Oh, how nice. I never would have guessed.

Berlioz: Look! They got rubber feet.

Toulouse: Yeah.

Abigail: We're on holiday.

Amelia: For a walking tour on France.

Abigail: Swimming, some of the way.

Amelia: On water, of course.

[They laugh]

Duchess to wet O'Malley: Thomas, this is Amelia and Abigail Gabble.

O'Malley: Yeah honey. Get those two web-footed lifeguards outta here!

Duchess: Now, now, Thomas.

O'Malley: Okay, okay baby. Hiya, chicks.

[Geese laugh]

Abigail: We're not chickens. We're geese.

O'Malley: No. I thought you were swans.

[Duchess gives him a look]

Amelia: Oh, flatterer

Abigail: Your husband is very charming and very handsome.

O'Malley rolling on his back: Well, uh, you see.. I, I'm not exactly her husband.

Amelia: Exactly? You either are or you're not.

O'Malley licks his paw: All right. I'm not.

Geese: Oh? Hmm?

Amelia: It's scandalous.

Abigail: He's nothing but a cad.

Amelia: Absolutely, possibly a reprobate.

Abigail: A roue. His eyes are too close together.

Amelia: Shifty too.

Abigail: And look at that crooked smile.

Amelia: His chin is very weak too.

Abigail: Obviously a philanderer who trifles with unsuspecting women's hearts.

Marie: How romantic.

Duchess: Please, please, let me explain. Thomas is a dear frend of ours. He's just helping us to get to--

O'Malley: Come on, Duchess, come on. Let's get out of here. Well, girls, see ya around. We're on out way to Paris.

Abigail: Oh, how nice! We're going to Paris ourselves.

Amelia: Why don't you join us?

Duchess: I think that's a splendid idea.

O'Malley: Oh, no.

Amelia: Now, ah, you stand here, dear. And uh, let's see, you take this position.

Abigail: Duchess, you'll do nicely here.

Amelia: Yes, very good.

Abigail: And you dear, you take this place. Now that leaves mister O'Malley.

Amelia: Oh, we can't leave him, can we?

Abigail: Mister O'Malley, I think you should be the rear end. Ready everyone? Now think goose! Forward, march!

Berlioz: Mama. Do we have to waddle like they do?

Duchess: Yes, dear. Think goose.

Amelia: When we get to Paris, you must meet uncle Waldo.

O'Malley: Waldo?

Amelia: Yes, he's our uncle. Now that leaves mister O'Malley.

Amelia: Oh, we can't leave him, can we?

Abigail: Mister O'Malley, I think you should be the rear end. Ready everyone? Now think goose! Forward, march!

Berlioz: Mama. Do we have to waddle like they do?

Duchess: Yes, dear. Think goose

Abigail: When we get to Paris, you must meet uncle Waldo.

O'Malley: Waldo?

Amelia: Yes, he's our ucnle. We are to meet uncle Waldo at le Petit Cafe.

Duchess: Le Petit Cafe? Oh, that's that famous restaurant. Ah, c'est magnifique.

{fade to Le Petit Cage}

Chef: Sacre blue! Ow! Oh! He bit my finger! Get out! Go! Go! Get out! Scram!

[Waldo runs outside]

Chef: Good riddance!

[Waldo without tailfeathers puts his hat on, sighes and hiccups]

Abigail: Why, why, it's uncle Waldo!

Waldo: Ahh! Abigail! Amelia! My two favorite nooses!

Amelia: Uncle Waldo. I do believe you've been drinking.

Abigail: Oh dear! What happened to your lovely tail feathers?

Waldo: Girls, it's outrageous! Why, you won't believe what they tried to do to your poor old uncle Waldo [hic] Look. Look at his! Prime country goose a la provencal stuffed with chestnuts and basted in white whine [hic]

O'Malley: Basted? He's been marinated in it.

Waldo: Dreadful! Being british, I would have preferred sherry.

[Three geese laugh]

Waldo: Sherry! Sherry.

Amelia: Oh! oh, oh, oh uncle Waldo, you're just too much.

Abigail: You mean he's had too much.

Amelia: Abigail, Abigail!

Abigail: Yes, yes?

Amelia: We best get uncle Waldo to bed.

Waldo: Why, I say there, now, what's all the whis-whispering about, huh?

Amelia and Abigail: Shh, shh!

Waldo: Now, now, now, now, girls, girls! Don't shush your old uncle Waldo! Why you'll, you'll wake up the whole neighborhood!

Abigail: Shh! No!

Waldo: Whoopee! Neighborhood!

Abigail: Come to sleep, uncle Waldo

Amelia: Oh, yes, I think we'd better be going.

Waldo: Oh, righto, girls. Birds of a feather must [hic] together.

Abigail: That's stick together.

[They waddle off, Waldo singing and the other geese shushing him]

O'Malley: You know something? I like uncle Waldo.

Duchess laughs: Especially when he's marinated!