The Irelanders' Adventures of Thomas & Friends: No More Mr Nice Engine

Here's the script for The Irelanders' Adventures of Thomas & Friends: No More Mr Nice Engine.

[The episode starts with Hiro puffing along the main line with Connor passing him]

Narrator: No More Mr Nice Engine. Hiro is one of the strongest engines on the island of Sodor.

[He stops in front of a family of ducks waddling across the tracks]

Narrator: But he's also very polite and kind.

[A duck quacks as if to thank Hiro. Hiro's at the washdown when Thomas arrives all dirty]

Hiro: After you, Thomas. Looks like you need a wash.

Thomas: Thank you, Hiro.

[Hiro whistles and reverses. The scene changes to the shunting yard where Diesel is working]

Narrator: One morning, Diesel was shunting some Troublesome Trucks in the yard.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee! Ouch!

[Diesel bumps them into line]

Diesel: Now get in line, you silly trucks! And stay still!

[Zach Varmitech comes over]

Zach Varmitech: Hey, big D. What's going on?

Diesel: I'm trying to get those Troublesome Trucks in line to stop doing mischief to engines. I don't suppose you and your Zachbots can help out.

Zach Varmitech: Zachbots, get those trucks in line and make sure they behave.

[The Zachbots obey and get to work. Edward blew his whistles as he got uncoupled from the trucks he's just brought]

Narrator: Edward had delivered trucks of milk, butter and cheese for Hiro to collect.

Diesel: Right, now it's your turn.

[He bump the trucks, knocking over the milk churns in the process]

Edward: Stop biffing the trucks, Diesel! You're spilling the milk!

Diesel: It's the only way to get these Troublesome Trucks to do what you want, Edward.

[He biffs the trucks that still need to be gotten into line]

Troublesome Trucks: Ow! Ow!

Diesel: So mind your own business.

Zach Varmitech: Yeah, old timer! Scram!

Edward: Oh. (whistles)

[He puff away. Hiro arrives with the Irelanders]

Narrator: A little later, Hiro arrived with the Irelanders, Marco Polo and his friends.

Hiro: Good morning, Diesel. Good morning, Zach. Good morning, trucks.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee-haha!

Connor Lacey: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Laugh it up.

Twilight Sparkle: Real funny.

Mewtwo: Look at who else is here.

[They look to see Diesel and Zach glaring at them]

Violet Parr: Well, well, well, if it isn't our two old nemesises.

Zach Varmitech: And if it isn't the Irelanders and annoying Wild Rats.

Chris and Martin Kratt: Wild Kratts!

Zach Varmitech: Whatever!

Diesel: What brings you all here?

Maisie Lockwood: We're helping Hiro collect milk, butter and cheese to Knapford's cafe.

Marco Polo: Yes. That's what we're doing.

Diesel: Oh, Hiro. Don't be such a "Mr Nice Engine". These trucks are nothing but troublesome and you need to show them who's boss.

[He biff the trucks forward]

Troublesome Trucks: Ow!

Hiro: No, Diesel, these trucks are no trouble. I am Master of the Railway.

Zach Varmitech: Oh, really? Since when people call you that when you can't run a railway like humans can?

Shi La Won: Since his time in Japan. And don't insult my BJFF's title like that!

Zach Varmitech: Oh, you're just too stupid because you should know that I'm a better inventor than Aviva any day.

Diesel: And that diesels are much more modern and better than old slow and out of date steamies who should be scrapped years ago so we deserves titles not steamies.

Aviva Corcovado: Oh really? My inventions have always been better than Zach's many times and steam engines deserve to have titles as well as diesels.

[Diesel growls]

Zach Varmitech: You just got lucky in the past. My inventions have always been superior to yours.

[Fu Fu growls at Zach]

Zach Varmitech: Aaah!

[He jumps onto his Zachbot then climbs down]

Zach Varmitech: What's wrong with it?

Connor Lacey: That he doesn't like you insulting Aviva and Shi La like that.

Zach Varmitech: (sarcastic) Ha-ha. It's so small. Must be a runt.

Shi La Won: Fu Fu is not a runt! He's just a baby.

Fireman Sam: Yes. We need to continue this later.

Hiro: Sam's right. Right now, we need to deliver the dairy produce to Knapford and we cannot be late.

Connor Lacey: Yes. Now if you'll excuse us, we'll be on our way.

Narrator: Hiro collected the trucks and puffed away.

[The manager blew his whistle and Hiro toots as he set off]

Narrator: But he didn't know that Diesel had already spilled the milk.

[Scene cuts to Hiro puffing along the Mainline]

Narrator: It wasn't long before the trucks started to become troublesome.

Troublesome Trucks: Hee-hee! Biff and bash! Biff and bash!

Shi La Won: Stop that!

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Spike: Quit it!

Hiro: Ho-ho, you can try and be troublesome, little trucks, but I am Master of the Railway.

Connor Lacey: (surprised at Hiro not bothered) How do you handle their troublesome antics?

Hiro: The same way Edward and Salty keeps them behave and be polite and kind.

Shi La Won: Oh. I see.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Narrator: The Troublesome Trucks made Hiro bump and judder, but he just kept puffing all the way to Knapford Station, where the Fat Controller was waiting from him.

The Fat Controller: At last, the supplies for the cafeteria.

Narrator: The men worked to unload bread and butter and cheese.

The Fat Controller: Let's not forget the milk.

Narrator: But when The Fat Controller opened the door to the milk truck......

[The truck is opened and the milk spills out]

Narrator: ...the milk poured out.

The Fat Controller: Oh, no! My trousers!

Connor Lacey: Oh, my goodness.

Shi La Won: Oh, dear.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Hiro: Oh, sir. I'm so sorry, sir. We... We don't know what happened. But the Troublesome Trucks have been very troublesome today.

Mewtwo: We know, they always are.

The Fat Controller: I hope you and the Irelanders will be more careful on your next job, Hiro.

Hiro: Yes, sir. We will, sir.

The Fat Controller: And it looks like my next job will be to get my trousers cleaned.

[He heads off]

Narrator: Hiro felt very bad about what had happened to the Fat Controller's trousers.

Shi La Won: Aw, don't be like that, Hiro. I know you didn't mean for the milk to spill on his trousers like that.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Hiro: I know, Shi La but I feel ashamed about it.

Twilight Sparkle: I'm just being curious here but the milk was spilled inside the truck.

Martin Kratt: Because of the trucks and their tricks.

Twilight Sparkle: No, what I mean, Martin, is that someone else caused this.

Connor Lacey: Like who?

Twilight Sparkle: Someone who we ran into just this morning. But let's keep that to ourselves for now.

Slyly: Here's a little secret, Hiro. When things get bad, I mean real bad, just remember, it could always be worse.

Hiro: How?

Slyly: Allow me, ahem, to elaborate.

[He starts singing It Could Always Be Worse]

Slyly: (singing) If the glass looks half empty,~

And your prospects are low.

Attitude adjustment's the only way to go

Things could be worse than that

You could be lost in the desert,

200 degrees,

No water around, and lots of snakes and bees

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

They could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

(Remember, it could always be worse)

You could be out to sea,

With no land in sight

Surrounded by sharks, with a big appetite

Things could be worse than that!

You could be lost in a forest,

End up stuck up in a tree

Chased by a Monster,

And no way to get free

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

They could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

(Remember, it could always be worse)

Don't look so sad,

And don't feel so bad,

That's not so hard to do...

Cause things could be worse than that

Life throws you some curves,

But just change your demeanor.

Cause trust me my friend,

the grass, it ain't always greener

Remember it's tough and it's cold out there.

Life, sometimes can be unfair

So, for every step forward

There's a step in reverse

Things could be better,

It could always be worse

Yes, things could be better in this big universe

But Remember, it could always be worse

Remember, it could always be worse

(Let me hear the band!!)

Remember, it could always be worse (laughs)

Hiro: That is a good song, Slyly.

Slyly: Well, glad you like it.

Leonard: We'II, we'II make sure that your next job won't have any spilled milk.

Hiro: Thank you, Leonard. I hope.

[The scene changes to Brendam Docks]

Narrator: Later, as Hiro and the Irelanders was picking up more cream and butter at Brendam Docks, they saw Diesel and Zach again.

Diesel: What's the matter, Hiro?

Hiro: Oh, Diesel and Zach. When we were delivering Troublesome Trucks this morning, The Fat Controller open the truck door and milk spilled out all over his trousers. I feel so ashamed.

Zach Varmitech: Well, not Master of the Railway now, aren't ya? (laughs)

Shi La Won: Hey! Don't insult Hiro like that!

Wilson: Yeah! You're just a big meanie!

Zach Varmitech: Well, actually, we don't care. At least a steam engine's accident would give diesels the advantage to prove that they're better than them.

Connor Lacey: To be honest with you, Zach, I'd put a sock in it if I were you!

Diesel: (snickers) See? I told you trucks were trouble. You should have shown them who's boss and given them a biff.

Hiro: No, Diesel, biffing the trucks is never the right way.

Fluttershy: Yeah. It's not very nice and cruel to do something like that to them.

Hiro: It is always best to be polite and kind.

Koki: That's right so you two and your ways cannot get those trucks to behave.

Irelanders: Yeah!

Luigi Bellini: Why can't I have some of the cheese, bread and milk? I haven't eat anything yet.

Twilight Sparkle: Luigi, there'll be plenty of time for eating when the job is done.

Lightning McQueen: Yeah. So be patient.

Dusty Crophopper: We better get a move on to deliver this load to Knapford.

Hiro: Right you are, Dusty.

[Hiro whistles and reverses to his train]

Narrator: Hiro was coupled up to the Troublesome Trucks, but Diesel and Zach were cross. They thought Hiro should listen to them.

Diesel: One day he'II learn.

Zach Varmitech: Yes. But how do we do that?

Narrator: Then Diesel had a very naughty idea.

[Diesel reverses down the line with Zach following him on his Zachbot. He moves to the back of the train]

Narrator: Instead of adding a brake van to Hiro's train, he was coupled up to the end of the line of Troublesome Trucks.

[Diesel and Zach grins deviously as he got coupled up. They move as Hiro sets off]

Narrator: Hiro puffed away pulling the Troublesome Trucks and Diesel with him.

[The scene cuts to the mainline where Hiro and the Irelanders are puffing along, unaware of Diesel and Zach's presences]

Narrator: Hiro's trucks were biffing and bashing as he went.

Troublesome Trucks: (laughs) Biff and bash! Biff and bash!

The Mask: Stop that!

Raven Queen: Knock it off!

Narrator: Hiro was still polite and gentle. But he and the Irelanders hadn't noticed that Diesel had been coupled to his train with Zach riding on his Zachbot beside him.

Diesel: I'II show Hiro what Troublesome Trucks can do.

Zach Varmitech: Yeah. We'll show him, Diesel.

Narrator: The next time Hiro puffed up the hill, Diesel put on his brakes to help the trucks go slowly.

[Diesel put on his brakes to make the trucks hold back, dragging Hiro back]

Troublesome Trucks: (laughs) Hold back! Hold back!

Maisie Lockwood: Will you stop that?!

Bob Parr/Mr Incredible: Yeah. Cut it out, or I'll cut the coupling!

Narrator: Hiro is a very strong engine, but Diesel is strong too. And Hiro had to puff very hard to get to the top of the hill. When they came down the other side, Diesel help the trucks to go as fast as they could.

[Diesel push the trucks and Hiro down the hill at a very high rate of speed]

Troublesome Trucks: (laughs) Faster! Faster! Faster!

Irelanders: [screaming]

Narrator: The Troublesome Trucks were having fun.

[Hiro and the Irelanders sped past Thomas through Wellsworth station]

Thomas: Wow! What's going on?

[Back with the Irelanders and Hiro]

James Jones: I don't like speed!

Rarity: That was very fast!

Chris Kratt: What is going on?!

Martin Kratt: I have no idea!

Luigi Bellini: This speed is giving me an appetite.

Iago: Does everything have to give you an appetite?

Luigi Bellini: Well, yeah.

Narrator: Hiro had never known these trucks to be so troublesome, although he still didn't say anything as Shi La could see.

Shi La Won: Why aren't you telling them to stop, Hiro?!

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Hiro: Be gentle and kind. (to himself) Remember, you are Master of the Railway.

Shi La Won: (groans in frustration)

Narrator: This made Diesel and Zach even more cross.

Zach Varmitech: (having enough) Alright, that's it! Biff them!

[Diesel biff the trucks]

Troublesome Trucks: (laughs)

Hiro: Stop that!

[Shi La could see that Hiro is now losing patience]

Shi La: Finally, he's starting to see sense.

Fireman Sam: I can see that.

Zach Varmitech: (snickers) Lose patience now.

[Diesel biffs the trucks again and they laugh]

Troublesome Trucks: (laughs) Biff and bash! Biff and bash!

[Hiro finally lost his patience]

Hiro: Right, that's it. No more "Mr Nice Engine". I am Master of the Railway.

Izzy: Yes, about time he saw what they are capable of!

[Edward, The Fat Controller and Mai Lacey are at Knapford when they saw Hiro and the Irelanders moving towards them fast then Hiro slam on his brakes]

Troublesome Trucks: Ow! Ow!

Hiro: That will show you!

[Diesel bump into the last truck as it stop suddenly, making three milk churns fly into the air]

Narrator: Hiro stopped so suddenly that three big barrels of cream flew through the air!

The Fat Controller: Not again!

Mai Lacey: Duck!

[The cream churns hit the ground and cream spills out over everyone]

Narrator: And splattered all over the Fat Controller... and Edward... and Hiro.

The Fat Controller: My trousers!

Hiro: Oh, no.

Shi La Won: Oh, dear.

Fu Fu: (chitters)

Irelanders: [gasps]

Narrator: The Fat Controller was covered in cream. He was very cross indeed.

The Fat Controller: Hiro, you have caused confusion and delay, and terrible trouble to my trousers.

Hiro: I'm so, so sorry, sir.

Connor Lacey: We tried to be more careful with the cream, sir.

Narrator: Diesel and Zach tried to sneak away....

[Diesel and Zach tries to sneak off without being seen but Thomas arrives just in time to block their escape]

Narrator: But Thomas pulled up behind them.

Thomas: Diesel, Zach, where are you going? Hiro, why was Diesel pushing you and your Troublesome Trucks?

[Everyone looks at Diesel and Zach]

Hiro: Diesel, Zach? Was it you two? Were you two the ones biffing and bashing me?

Edward: And he spilled your milk this morning, Hiro. Zach also ordered his Zachbots to get the trucks into order and mistreat them too.

[The Fat Controller, Mai and the Irelanders

Hiro: Diesel?

Diesel: Um, sorry.

Zach Varmitech: Uh-oh.