The Super Taskforce Squad's Adventures in My Little Pony: The Movie (2017)/Transcript

This is the transcript of The Super Taskforce Squad's Adventures in My Little Pony: The Movie (2017)

The Beginning/Deadpool's Apartment/Thanos Contacts the Storm King
(the film starts at Deadpool's apartment, Deadpool was sitting on his chair reading a book when he notices the camera)
 * Deadpool: Oh. [puts his book away] Hey there guys, Deadpool here, and no, I'm not dead and I don't have a pool.
 * Serious Voice: I think they know that by now genius.
 * Deadpool: Whatever, anyways, a few days ago, I ordered a copy of the My Little Pony: The Movie script online, why? Because today's Super Taskforce Squad film is based on that, and I wanna catch up on the events on that film before we get into it.
 * (the doorbell rings and a manuscript goes through the mail slot)
 * Deadpool: Oh look at that, it's here already. (picks it up and looks through) And as I thought, words, everywhere!
 * Screwball Voice: Laaaaame...
 * Serious Voice: We should READ some of them.
 * Deadpool: [annoyed] Fine. [starts reading the script] "In the magical land of Equestria, we have four powerful Princesses..." Yeah. [rips a page out] Don't need that. [grabs a crayon and starts drawing on it] Edit that. [continues to draw]
 * Serious Voice: Ah, crayons, very classy.
 * Screwball Voice: What do we need the script for again?
 * Deadpool: To memerise it, either way, who cares, I'm making art here. Behold! [shows the edited pages with crayon on it]
 * Serious Voice: Hmm, it’s good, though I’m not sure if the audience understands our thinking yet.

(the scene switches to the fully rebuilt Death Star) (Later, Thanos is seen in the communications room)
 * Deadpool: [to the audience] Hey audience, just go with it. The Super Taskforce Squad's about to change your flipping lives. BRING THE NOISE!!!
 * Thanos: [in his chair] Conquering the Earth has proven more difficult than expected thanks to those Taskforce Squad fools!
 * Dr. Neo Cortex: Well, what were you expecting? It's never easy being a villain you know!
 * Dr. Eggman: Yeah.
 * Bowser: Well, what do we know now, our last plan with using the Chaos Emeralds and the Hyper Metal Sonic to destroy Planet Freedom failed, and three of our members outright left.
 * Shang Tsung: Yes, Cipher cut all ties with us when we revealed we would need his power for the plan to work, Knockout outright betrayed us to join the "winning team" apparently, and Vader quit since he couldn't tolerate Palpatine torturing the Mane Six with his force lightning, taking most of the Storm Troopers with him.
 * Doctor Doom: And speaking Palpatine, a huge majority of the league ended up injured, had Quan-Chi not accelerated the recovery process, they'd still be in a cast.
 * Infinite: Just be thankful that none of us got killed, we'll get our revenge on those fools soon enough.
 * Thanos: Indeed... [thinks for a moment then gets a idea] Assemble the troops, I have a new plan, one that can't surely fail.
 * Sektor: Are you sure about this, I mean, if something goes wrong, it could likely mean your end.
 * Thanos: Trust me Sektor, I've known this guy for some time now, he's been planning to takeover Equestria for a while from what I've heard.
 * Sektor: I see, well, just contact him, I need to get the Cyber Lin Kuei back online. [walks away]
 * Thanos: Right. [presses on buttons on the control panel, contacting the Storm King]
 * [dial-up modem noises]
 * The Storm King: Where am I supposed to be looking? I never understood how this contraption works. Thanos!
 * Thanos: Over here, Storm King.
 * The Storm King: Where?
 * Thanos: Over here.
 * The Storm King: Huh?
 * Thanos: No. No you nimrod, right. Look right.
 * The Storm King: My right?
 * Thanos: Yep.
 * The Storm King: Oh. There you are. [bows to Thanos]
 * Thanos: Yes, good to see you, I assume you already sent Tempest on her to Equestria.
 * The Storm King: Well, I will be in a few minutes, why?
 * Thanos: Simple, I have a plan that should not only work in your favour, but in mine as well.
 * The Storm King: Huh, I see, and... Look, I'm not if you've noticed but, I'm in the middle of a big re-brand here. "The Storm King" is tracking well as "intensely intimidating", but you know what? I need to back it up. You know what I need to back it up with? A storm! That would be great!
 * Thanos: I know, you mentioned this to me, every time.
 * The Storm King: I know, yet, right now I'm only holding a what? A branch. A twig. Bleh!
 * Thanos: That would be the Staff of Sacanas Stormy, if my calulations are correct, it'll channel the magic you plan on stealing from the alicorn princesses.
 * The Storm King: Indeed so, and once this thing is fully powered up, I'll have the power of a hundred armies.
 * Thanos: Quite so, however, I have a little suggestions for your plan.
 * The Storm King: Oh really, what would that be?
 * Thanos: Well...
 * [Several minutes of explaining later]
 * The Storm King: So, let me get this staight, you want us, to not only take the magic from the four alicorns, but from the purple one's friends as well?
 * Thanos: Yes, you see, Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends, Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Rainbow Dash are the current wielders of the Elements of Harmony, and can therefore use the Elements' power to turn the tide of the battle, or even go Rainbow Power if they wanted to.
 * The Storm King: Your point?
 * Thanos: My point is they could still be a threat if we just drain Twilight, no dobut her five friends would come to rescue her if she was captured during the invasion.
 * The Storm King: Right... But what about these... Starlight Glimmer, Sunset Shimmer, and Trixie Lulamoon girls, why drain them exactly?
 * Thanos: Well, before she was reformed, Starlight was shown to be quite powerful, considering she could remove other ponies' cutie marks and use Star Swirl's time travel spell to change the future for her own benifet, Sunset has been shown to the Twilight Sparkle of the Equestria Girls world, even though a Twilight Sparkle exists there as well, as for Trixie, she's shown to be somewhat of a nuisence if anything, but that didn't exactly save her from using the Alicorn Amulet that one time.
 * The Storm King: Uh-huh, and why do you want a portion of the magic put into you? Couldn't you just use the Infinity Gauntlet or something?
 * Thanos: I would, but the Infinity Stones are currently out of my reach, and presides, if the magic proves too unstable, I have a backup plan. [looks at Infinite and the Phantom Ruby implanted in his chest]
 * The Storm King: Okay, I see your point, very well, I'll grant you your request.
 * Thanos: Excellent, once everything's set, the Super Taskforce Squad won't know what hit them.
 * The Storm King: Of course they won't, if you don't mind, I've gotta tell Tempest about your idea, see ya!
 * [The call disconnects]
 * Thanos: [to the rest of the Villian League] Assemble the troops, we've got a world to rule! [laughs evilly]