This is the transcript for the episode E.C. The Extra Creepy/Toad Warriors.
The Plumber Rap: Part 1[]
Mario: Hey, paisanos! It's the Super Mario Bros. Super Show!
[theme song]
[Singers]
We're the Mario Brothers, and plumbing's our game
We're not like the others who get all the fame
If your sink is in trouble, you can call us on the double
We're faster than the others, you'll be hooked on the brothers. Uh!
H-hooked on the brothers
Gimme gimme, gimme gimme
Yo, you're in for a treat, so hang on to your seat
Get ready for adventure and remarkable feats
You'll meet Koopa, the Troopas, the Princess and the others
Hanging with the plumbers, you'll be hooked on the brothers!
To the bridge!
Uh, uh!
I said-a h-h-h-h-hooked on the brothers!
The brothers!
The brothers!
E.C. the Extra Creepy: Part 1[]
[instrumental music]
Mario: (whistles)
Luigi: Yo! Where we going tonight?
Mario: We? We ain't going nowhere. But me and my computer date, are going out on a mad night of love, romance, and copper fittings.
Luigi: So you've got a date. Is that what this is all about? (whistles) What a file! Luxuriant body hair, bulging muscles, can bench press 500 pounds. Mario? What kind of a woman is this?
Mario: Those are not her qualities, those are mine. I copied them from a Rambo bubblegum card. Hers are on the bottom.
Luigi: Rambo bubblegum card. Out of this world girl with head in the clouds, loves to travel. Mario, this girl sounds like a 747.
Mario: Oh, yeah, go ahead, go ahead, Luigi, make fun of her. But when you see my date, boy, will you be jealous. Oh, her name is E.C.
[rumbling]
Mario: Oh, that must be her now.
Luigi: Really? Feels like she's driving an 18 wheeler.
[doorbell ringing]
Mario: I'm telling you, Luigi. I'm telling you, be nice to her.
Luigi: I will, I will, I will. Feel sorry for her. Wow! That's what I call a computer date.
Mario: Hello, I'm Mario. And uh, this is my brother, Luigi. May I have your hand?
E.C.: As you wish, dream mate Mario.
(Scene fades to black to a commercial bumper.)
Mario [voice-over]: The Super Mario Bros. Super Show will return.
Mario [voice-over]: Now back to the Super Mario Bros. Super Show.
The Plumber Rap: Part 2[]
[theme music]
Here we go, yo!
It's the Mario Brothers, and plumbing's their game
Found the secret warp zone while working on the drain
Lend the Princess a hand in the Mushroom Land
Join the action with the plumbers, you'll be hooked on the brothers!
Now, evil Koopa and his Troopas are up to misbehaving
They kidnapped the Princess, Mushroom Land needs saving
Amusing and confusing, everybody discovers
They can't help but be hooked on the brothers. Uh!
Toad Warriors[]
Mario: (narrating) Plumber's Log, 10-24. Rotten King Koopa had stolen every drop of spaghetti sauce in Car Land. But a small band of Mushroom Rebels, in a desert fort were making their own, and we were on our way to join them. Only trouble was, one of King Koopa's state Troopas, was hot on our trail.
(Toad's driving the gang down a desert highway in a brown convertible. They are being followed by a police car with a Troopa in a police uniform and a Larry Koopa-style hairdo driving.)
Mario: You shouldn't have broken the speed limit, Toad! You'll have to pull over.
(The Troopa pulls out a Cobrat and the Cobrat spits a bullet at them.)
Mario: I never should have let you drive.
Toad: You wanted a nap, remember?
Mario: But not in jail!
(The two cars pull over. The Troopa pulls out an intercom and talks into it.)
Koopa Troopa: Car 54 and a half calling King Koopa. I've arrested the Princess and her faucet freak friends.
(Meanwhile, the call is picked up by King Koopa, who is with Mouser on a cliff overlooking the Rebel fort. King Koopa's wearing a leather jacket, a nose ring, and a Larry wig.)
King Koopa: Lock them up and throw away the key. And whatever you do, don't let them get away!
(King Koopa puts the intercom away.)
King Koopa: The last of the spaghetti sauce is almost in my hands. I'll make a fortune selling it back to those miserable Mushrooms! And now I've got that pesky Princess too! (laughs)
(Meanwhile, Mario and the gang are up against the convertible with Troopa pointing the Cobrat at them.)
Koopa Troopa: No, you can't call your lawyer or your mother. Any other questions? Huh? Whoa!
(Suddenly, a chopper flies out of the sky and nearly hits the Troopa.)
Koopa Troopa: Yikes! A Mushroom Rebel chopper!
(The Troopa runs and ducks under his car. The Toad chopper pilot drops a ladder down to the Mario Bros.)
Chopper Pilot: Come on, Princess! Your people need you!
Mario: Go, Princess! Go while you can! We'll meet you at the Rebel fort.
Chopper Pilot: Hang on!
(Princess Toadstool climbs onto the rope ladder and the chopper flies away.)
Princess Toadstool: Goodbye!
Toad: Now's our chance to escape!
(The Troopa pops up behind them holding a Bob-omb.)
Koopa Troopa: Don't even think about it, sewer scum! Bob-omb won't like that. I'm in big enough trouble as it is losing the Princess, without losing you guys too!
(King Koopa's voice blares out of the intercom in the police car.)
King Koopa: Car 54 and a half. Come in! Or else!
(The Troopa looks over nervously.)
Koopa Troopa: (gulps) Uh-oh. Watch 'em, Bob-omb.
(Troopa darts over to the police car. While he's gone, Toad starts slinging insults at the Bob-omb.)
Toad: Hey, Bob-omb! Did anyone ever tell you that you were ugly? I've seen better looking bombs after they exploded. I bet you have to sneak up on a match just to get a light!
(Bob-omb gets so mad, his fuse ignites.)
Toad: Run for it, guys!
(Mario, Luigi, and Toad all run off. The Troopa finishes his report to King Koopa and climbs out of the car to see that they escaped.)
Koopa Troopa: You stupid bang head! Look what... Ah!
(Bob-omb glares at him.)
Koopa Troopa: No, don't go off now!
(The Troopa dives on top of the Bob-omb and puts out his fuse.)
Koopa Troopa: (sighs)
(Meanwhile, the Rebel chopper arrives at the Rebel fort and comes in for a landing.)
Rebels: Hail Princess! Hail Princess!
(Up on the hill, King Koopa, Mouser, and a bunch of Troopas are revving the engines of their cars.)
King Koopa: Get your motors running! They've got the Princess inside that Rebel fort! Koopa Pack, attack!
(The army speeds towards the fort.)
Princess Toadstool: They're coming! We must give hold them off until my friends arrive.
(The Rebels start throwing vegetables at the Troopas, knocking a few off their cars.)
Koopa Troopa: Yikes! Here! Take this!
(The Troopa fires a Cobrat at them. One of the Rebels jumps out of the way before the bomb hits. Mouser, who is driving a car that looks like a ketchup bottle, gets hit by a pumpkin. His car flips over and lands on its side.)
Mouser: Cheese and crackers! How did that happen?
King Koopa: That mouse brain! To think of all of the coins, I wasted on his driver's Ed classes.
(A Troopa's car with three Birdos on top zooms King Koopa. The Birdos fire at the fort, blowing up little bits of it.)
Princess Toadstool: We need help.
(Meanwhile, the Mario Bros. are driving down the highway in the convertible with the radio going.)
Mario: This is the life. The wind in your face! A driving song on the radio, nothing ahead but the open road! Ah!
(Princess Toadstool's voice comes over the radio.)
Princess Toadstool: Mario! Toad! Luigi! If you can hear me, we need help! And fast!
Mario: Time to put the peddle to the metal! Hang on, guys!
(Mario pulls a switch and the car speeds off down the highway at blinding speed. Back at the Rebel fort...)
Mouser: King Koopa, sir, I just got word from your state Troopa. The plumbers have escaped!
King Koopa: Those miserable wrench heads won't ruin my evil plans! Prepare for an ambush, Mouser! Make road pizzas out of them!
(A Mario head transitions to Mario and the gang are still driving toward the Rebel fort. Toad notices that they're being followed by a group of state Troopas.)
Toad: Check your rear view mirror, Mario!
Mario: Handsome devil, ain't I?
(A truck drives right in the path of the chase.)
Luigi: Mario, w-w-w-watch out!
Toad: Yikes!
Mario: Leaping lasagna! Unfasten your seat belts, guys, and get ready to jump!
(Mario brakes the car and they all fly into the sky. Toad grabs a nearby Star before they fall toward the Rebel fort. King Koopa watches them through binoculars.)
Princess Toadstool: Quick! Get some mattresses!
King Koopa: I've heard of falling stars, but plummeting plumbers?
(The Rebels bring out a stack of mattresses and the Mario Bros. and Toad bounce off them.)
Princess Toadstool: My heroes!
King Koopa: Enough Mr. Nice Guy, it's time for my ultimate weapon. Mouser, bring forth the Thunder Birdo!
(Mouser drivers up a car with a giant Birdo riding on the front.)
King Koopa: Fire!
(Thunder Birdo fires a giant egg at the fort, blowing it into a pile of rubble.)
King Koopa: End of the road, Princess Toadstool! End of the road! (laughing)
(Scene fades to black to a commercial bumper.)
Mario [voice-over]: Be right back, paisanos.
Mario [voice-over]: We're back, paisanos.
Mouser: Let's go and get 'em, boss! I bet we barbecued 'em.
King Koopa: Wait till the smoke clears, Mouser. Those plumbers are tricky. It could be a sink trap.
[dramatic music]
(The Mario Bros., Toad, and the Princess all climb out of manholes in a not-so-ruined part of the fort.)
Princess Toadstool: Come on, guys! King Koopa and his men will be swarming all over us any minute now. We have to decoy him away so the Rebels can escape!
Mario: But how? We don't have anything he wants.
Princess Toadstool: Yes, we do.
(Princess Toadstool shows them a tanker truck with a faucet on the side.)
Princess Toadstool: A tanker full of spaghetti sauce. Mario, you'll drive the truck, and I'll go with you. You, Luigi, are going to be our eyes in the sky.
Luigi: Huh?
Princess Toadstool: You, Luigi. You'll be piloting the helicopter.
Luigi: Me? But I don't know how to fly! I don't even know how to drive!
(The Toad chopper pilot walks up to the Princess.)
Princess Toadstool: (to Chopper Pilot) Show Luigi how to fly the heli... (gasps)
(Another Birdo egg bombs the fort.)
Princess Toadstool: ...copter! And make it quick!
(As Luigi and the pilot go to the chopper, Toad shows the Princess the Star.)
Toad: Look what I got, Princess!
Princess Toadstool: Good work, Toad! With that Star, you can do anything! You can be the Toad Warrior!
Toad: You got it! By the power of the shining Star, I am the...
(Toad suddenly turns into a biker. He wears a blue jacket, leather gloves, and a biker helmet that has the same pattern as the top of his head.)
Toad: ...Toad Warrior!
(All of Toad Rebels start cheering.)
Toad: Hey, man, I'm the Fantastic Fungus! The supercharged Mushroom of Might! I'm the Toad Warrior!
Mario: (to Princess Toadstool) He's been watching a little too much TV lately, don't you think?
(One of the Toads come up with a bag of bomb plants.)
Toad: Give me five!
(The Rebel extends his hand.)
Toad: No, give me five bomb plants!
(Princess Toadstool and Mario hop in the truck, Luigi lifts the chopper off, and Toad revs his bike. Another bomb hits the fort.)
Princess Toadstool: Let's go! Hit the road, Toad!
Toad: Lead on, doll face!
(Back outside, King Koopa's army is about to enter the fort.)
Mouser: Come on, boss! They're not even firing back! They must be history!
King Koopa: Oh, all right. Let's move in!
(They heard the sound of an approaching vehicle.)
Mouser: What the?
(King Koopa and Mouser jump away as the tanker speeds off down the road.)
Mario: Next time, Koopa, use the crosswalk!
King Koopa: I'll get you for this, Mario! Koopa Pack, re-attack!
(The chopper flies into King Koopa, knocking him onto his stomach.)
King Koopa: And get that loser Luigi too!
(Toad's bike runs over King Koopa.)
King Koopa: Ouch! And get him! Get them! Get all of them!
(The song "Born To Be Wild" plays as The Troopas take off after them. One of them drives alongside the tanker and throws a Bob-omb at it. It lands in Mario's lap. Another Troopa comes up on the other side. Princess Toadstool takes the Bob-omb and chucks it at the Troopa, blowing his car to bits. Luigi flies low to avoid a bird and flies into a Troopa who was coming up behind the truck. The car spins off the road and crashes. The three Birdos car fires at the truck. The shots miss, but cause the truck to swerve. Luigi drops a Bob-omb down on the Birdos. KA-BOOM! By now, King Koopa has joined the pack in his own car.)
King Koopa: Forward, ho!
(Toad drives up alongside King Koopa.)
Toad: Hey, punk, wanna drag?
(Toad zooms off, leaving a cloud of dust in King Koopa's face.)
King Koopa: (coughs) No measly Mushroom beats King-of-the-Road Koopa in a (coughs) race.
(Mouser drives through the pack with Thunder Birdo.)
Mouser: Out of the way! Coming through!
Mario: Uh-oh. Here comes trouble. It's Mouser, driving that Thunder Birdo.
(Princess Toadstool grabs a bag of Bob-ombs and opens the door.)
Princess Toadstool: Just keep going, I'll take care of racers rat!
(Another Bob-omb hits the truck. Princess Toadstool climbs onto the back end and drops a Bob-omb down on an unsuspecting Troopa. Mouser drives up with Thunder Birdo.)
Mouser: Jump for it, Princess! I'm gonna blow that truck off the road!
Princess Toadstool: That's what you think. Yo!
(Princess Toadstool throws the bag into Thunder Birdo's mouth. The big egg-shooter and the car are blown to smithereens. Mouser flies into the air. Luigi drops a bomb from his chopper on Mouser.)
Luigi: What goes up, must come down.
Mouser: Not again!
boom
Mouser: Whoa!
(Mouser disappears into the sky. Meanwhile, King Koopa and Toad are neck-and-neck.)
Toad: First one to the Grand Koopa Canyon gets the spaghetti sauce. Deal?
King Koopa: Deal! For sure it won't be you, biker breath!
[instrumental music]
(The tanker crosses the canyon by a bridge.)
Princess Toadstool: We got 'em all, Mario. Every single one of Koopa's state Troopas. But what about King Koopa?
(The two racing rivals speed toward the canyon.)
King Koopa: Hey, warthog! Let's play chicken!
Toad: Whoever slows down first loses!
(Mario, Luigi, and Princess Toadstool watch as Toad and King Koopa jump the canyon. King Koopa's car fails to make it and slams into the cliff wall. Toad, however, makes it with ease.)
King Koopa: Whoa!
(King Koopa's car falls into the canyon, but King Koopa opens a parachute and floats down into a river.)
King Koopa: I'll be back! You can't keep a bad Koopa down!
(Toad loses his Star power and becomes himself again.)
Toad: Wow! No more Toad Warrior.
Mario: You made it, Toad!
Toad: We all made it!
Princess Toadstool: Thank you, my friends! You've saved my people again. There will be spaghetti sauce for everyone!
Mario: Sounds good to me!
(Mario runs up to a faucet on the side of the tanker.)
Princess Toadstool: Wait! Mario!
Mario: I can't, I've been eating dried pasta for weeks! I gotta have it!
(Mario turns the handle and pasta sauce shoots out, knocking Mario over.)
Princess Toadstool: You got it, all right!
Everyone: (laughing)
E.C. the Extra Creepy: Part 2[]
Luigi: Yo, Mario, I gotta tell you, something's not right.
Mario: Hey, I don't care. She's beautiful, plus she's got a great sense of humor, and she's backed by two year warranty. So, what's the problem?
Luigi: What's the problem? We got two problems. Number one, I go outside, check our car, no license plates. Number two, you know Mrs. Schweckner upstairs? She come down touched the feather of our car, ba-da-bing, ba-da-bang, ba-da-boom, turned into dust!
Mario: Ah, must be one of those new burglar alarms.
Luigi: Sheesh.
E.C.: Nice place you got there, you got here, you got here, you got here.
Mario: Isn't she something special?
Luigi: Oh, yeah, she's real special, Mario. She's snacking on a wrench.
whirr
Mario: I don't care, I'm in love.
Luigi: You're in love? Mario, you're in love with a night light.
(After a Mario head transition...)
E.C.: I must leave.
Mario: Why? Where you going?
Luigi: Where you going?
E.C.: I must return to my home planet, to watch more scenes from the exciting Legend of Zelda.
Luigi: Ooh.
E.C. the Extra Creepy: Part 3[]
[instrumental music]
Luigi: Where are you, Mario? Why aren't you home yet? Oh. I hope Mario's not up there.
[rumbling]
Luigi: That's them now.
[instrumental music]
Mario: Oh, what a ride we had, Luigi. When this lady drives over the Brooklyn Bridge, she drives over the Brooklyn Bridge.
Luigi: Wait a minute. Tell her you didn't marry her, Mario.
thud
Mario: I didn't marry her, Mario. Oh, I'll tell you, Luigi. First, we had trouble with the blood test. I mean, I wasn't a positive? Ha! She was 30 white.
Luigi: Wait a minute! Mario, this is not a computer date! You're dating a computer!
Computer Voice: Attention, all robots. Return to spaceship and depart. Brooklyn cannot sustain quality life.
E.C.: I must leave, Mario, poopsie woopsie.
Mario: Can I have something to remember you by?
E.C.: You will always be my heart.
[whirring]
Luigi: Are you jealous? Huh?
Mario: Eat your heart out.
Luigi: (laughs) Ooh.
(Scene fades to black to a commercial bumper.)
Mario [voice-over]: Stick around, paisanos. We'll be right back.
Ending Segment[]
Mario: Until next time, everybody.
Mario and Luigi: Do the Mario!